YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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