i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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