please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Yo dont text me then not text me
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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