No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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