I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
