dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
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