He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize