just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
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