maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize