Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
