It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
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