what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
