The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
