ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed