What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize