Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
