Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Dignity is for republicans.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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