I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
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just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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