Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
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He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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