Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
