you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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