How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
These 23 Groupies Had The Most Insane Sexual Experiences With Celebs
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
35 Of The Funniest Things People Said While Banging
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.