why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
