you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I will be naked everywhere
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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