I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
