We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
