btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
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I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
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And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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