I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol