Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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