i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
