I feel like abortions should bother me more
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I have already put on my inside pants.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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