My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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