recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
