I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
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