We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
