id be glad to
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
