OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
i out mim tonsoeep
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
