It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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