I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
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