your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Randomize
