covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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