i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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