Dual....:-)
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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