So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Dick very happy bro
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
