I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
