help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize
