he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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