i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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