I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize