I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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